Inspired?

Man oh man...today Sissy and I took a walk down memory lane...and honestly...I am not sure if I wanted take that walk.

Started out okay. We went to the Black Bear Diner, where I used to hang out in high school, and where half the people I knew in high school are still employed (sadly). I seriously felt like I was 16 again...I even got that same anxious feeling well up in me after I ordered the usual (which they still remembered...scary!)...that I may not make it back for the 1:17 pm lunch bell. I almost looked for my old Jeep when we got outside. Almost.

Sissy then decided she wanted to get an ice cream cone and go up to the fish hatchery down the street. I literally have not been up to the fish hatchery since I was about 12. The nostalgia that coursed over me as we pulled up to the parking lot in front of the ancient "Sisson Museum" was refreshing. We happily paid our 20 cents for fish food (sick)...and were on our way to the ponds. I half expected ghosts of my past (my mom, Ashley Lindholm, Laura Guill,and KIM!) to come around the back of the old museum any minute. Interesting half hour.

When Sissy had her fill of feeding the abnormally large rainbow trouts that populate the hatchery, we got in the car, and drove up the mountain to Panther Meadows. Yet another place I haven't been since I was about 17. I used to drive up to that Vista Point about once a week with my high school boyfriend, Clint, and look at the shooting stars. I almost felt like I was violating a sacred memory by going up there during the day.

Almost every place I went today...I had an overly anxious feeling. I think really, it was because that's what Mount Shasta was for me...a place full of teenage angst. I was always anxious about something...cheerleading practice, my relationship with Clint, my curfew, my friends...or whatever else happened to be going on. Even coming down Everitt Memorial Highway, I couldn't just relax....I might be late for something. What...I am not even sure of anymore.

I don't have this overly anxious feeling in Chicago...which on the hole may sound odd. Chicago is supposed to be the most stressful city on America...at least according to Rutgers. How is it that Mount Shasta, a place that is supposed to be "A little Heaven on Earth" (according to the lame tourist bureau)get me so worked up, when I can relax in CHICAGO.

Maybe it's the feeling of getting lost among the millions of Chicago citizens...maybe it's the knowledge that nobody really cares what I am up to...or maybe it's just the wonderful Midwest attitude that really completes me. Either way...I'd rather be dancing in the rain in Chicago, then stuck here in Mount Shasta the way so many of my friends have chosen to be.

Until next time-